Sunday, December 21, 2008

Not Me Monday - 14th edition

Christmas is almost upon us and unlike last week, I'm not nearly as stressed out about all I have to do yet. I'm down to two small gifts to purchase and a couple to wrap. My cards are in the mail or have been hand delivered at church or at Christmas parties.

The hot topic around here right now is the weather. When we awoke at PapaBear's parents house Sunday morning it was -37 with the windchill. The air temp was -12. Ouch. We only live fifteen minutes from their house but PapaBear made the wise call to spend the night instead of driving to and from their Christmas party Saturday. That morning we packed up bedding, clothes, snowsuits, the dog, and gifts and headed out before the storm got any worse.

Before the guests arrived at the party it was not me who bribed BrotherBear with five cookies if he'd take a the pack-n-play. He's four for crying out loud!

I made good on my offer and since he followed through on his end and played so nicely with the other kids, I let him have pretty much anything he asked for.
He didn't stay up until 11pm because of all the sugar. That is not three hours past his bedtime.
He did not eat so much that he made himself puke in the middle of the night and again first thing in the morning.

What else didn't I do this week? Let see.... Could this be the week that I only have a couple of Not Me moments?

I suppose making dentist appointments for 3 of us at the same time wouldn't help my cause at all, huh?

It all started a couple of weeks ago when I tried to get to the dentist, but a train stopped on the tracks and there wasn't time to detour around it. I did not see a semi truck (and trailer!) turn around behind me because of the delay.
I called the clinic to reschedule. I was secretly relieved. Now we could ALL go. At least then I wouldn't be outnumbered. On Thursday we made the hour drive for our 6pm appointments. PapaBear's name was called first and I tried not to worry about my name being called before he returned.
Nobody will believe the following series of events. Which is fine. They are completely fabricated. Isn't that the point of this post anyway? The things that didn't happen to me?
In that case: They didn't call my name 5 minutes into BrotherBear's cleaning.
He didn't have to look at me with scared eyes from across the room while I was also flat on my back trying to decipher the thick Russian accent of my hygienist.
SisterBear did not sit through half my cleaning with her chin propped up with her hands while contained in the sling - while I was in the dentist chair - flat on my back.
They did not squeeze SisterBear in for a cleaning at the last minute - not the dentist that takes four weeks to get an appointment with!
SisterBear did not take her turn in the dentist chair across the room while mommy was being examined by the doctor.
That was not my two year old getting her first teeth cleaning all by herself.
I am not devastated that BrotherBear has five cavities. If that doesn't qualify me for the bad mom of the year award, I don't know what does!

Oh wait. I know! Sloooowly killing our cat. That's what!
Let me explain....My good friend from college, Courtney, is a doctor - an animal one. She and I had plans to get together last weekend, but the icy roads made that impossible. During our phone conversation we got to talking about our new kitty, Houston. I mentioned that we are trying to keep him as an outside cat as much as possible so he'll be a good mouser. We give him some of our dog's food from time to time, but for the most part he's on his own. That's when she told me that a cat's diet that is made up of mostly dog food can kill them. They'll develop a heart condition and die. (Too much of a certain ingredient that's ok for dogs, but fatal for cats)

Hi, my name is MamaBear and I'm not killing our cat.

Courtney drove over an our on icy roads yesterday to spend the afternoon with me. How sweet was that!?!

Here's the rest of my list for the week:

See this beauty? It's not mine.Because it isn't mine, I can't be super excited that it only cost $25.
I didn't offer $40 for it after I heard I was second in line to purchase it. The guy didn't say "$25 is fine. I just want it out of my basement."

I did not feel like a complete outsider at the mall Wednesday night. I was just like all the other shoppers out buying buying buying. I didn't get anxious driving in all the traffic or being in an unfamiliar place. Not me! It's the mall. I used to work there. I took the kids there all the time. I'm was not like a fish out of water now that we live in the country on a tighter budget. I'm totally used to the hustle and bustle. It doesn't freak me out one bit.

PapaBear does not ever use my camera for mischief. There's no proof. None what-so-ever.

If you thought I was exaggerating about the snow getting inside our house, think again. This is not what we came home to find in our breezeway. I do not shudder when I think about how much snow there'd be if we didn't stick a towel along the bottom edge!

As for the snow in our dining isn't melting - really it's not. Our house is not that cold and drafty. It's a warm 62 degrees in here! I'm not going to call the furnace company again in the morning. Not me!

SisterBear did not fall asleep in our bed in the two minutes it took me to get her brother out of the tub and into his pj's at nap time. (I'm not saying it's jammie day around here almost every day. Nope. I'm not admitting that.) She is not firmly planted in the dent wrote about in this post.

BrotherBear's Christmas program was Sunday afternoon. PapaBear ran the video camera and I snapped some pictures of the group. It was the cutest thing to watch.
I'd tell you why BrotherBear (red sweater vest) and a few of his friends are bending over, but there isn't a reason. It's just what they were doing while the teacher narrated the scene. To keep SisterBear from running down to the front to be with her brother I did not whisper loudly, "DO YOU WANT MONEY?" to get her back in the pew with us. Nope not me. You will NOT find that on video no matter how hard you look. You most certainly won't find four pennies in her denim jumper either. I don't give toddlers coins!

For more Not Me Monday fun, check out my friend MckMama's blog or to view the main page of my blog click here. I'm not adding that last link because when I visit some blogs of other Not Me participants I don't secretly wish I could, with a click of my mouse, see the rest of their blog without having to delete text in the address bar. Nope. Not me! I'm not THAT lazy!


  1. Wow I didn't know that about cats. Had absolutely no idea. I don't have any so it's not a problem here, but it's nice to know.

  2. This was the best Not Me post I've read in a long time. So funny! And your husband is NAUGHTY! ;-) Just so you know, I've never used money as bribery either. Not even to get someone to eat his vegetables...

  3. Whoops, sorry, didn't mean to post my comment twice. I DIDN'T DO THAT!

  4. This was the best Not Me post I've read in a long time. So funny! And your husband is NAUGHTY! ;-) Just so you know, I've never used money as bribery either. Not even to get someone to eat his vegetables...

  5. I can't believe you have snow in your house.

    I could imagine my 4 year old (well now 5) trying to sleep in a pack in play!!! Great list and pictures!

  6. Yikes! about the snow in your house. I guess my scraping windows inside our house isn't so bad after all. (yes it is)

    Loved your not me's. had me laughing.

  7. OMGoodness!! I found your Blog through "MckMama's Blog" soon as I saw your ADORABLE Blog I knew I would be back...BEAUTIFUL Family and AWESOME Blog!!

  8. I don't have the snow but my house is sure cold enough to keep the snow in its present state were it in here.

  9. Love your list and as for bribery...I did not bribe a 6 year old with popcorn so he would be quiet and watch the movie that I like.

  10. Well who knew they actually made cat and dog food for a REASON!! Interesting, actually.

    I can't believe how much snow you have IN your house! I'd be on the phone tot he furnace company, too. Yikes!

    Stay warm.....brrrrrr.....

  11. ROFL! I believe this is my first visit here!! Nice to meet you!


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