Four years ago tomorrow I got that horrible phone call saying that my dad had died during the night. I still have moments where I struggle with the guilt I feel for not reaching out to him more in the years after I moved to Minnesota. Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine that he wouldn't live to see his 57 th birthday. I often think of him watching Sam and Julia from Heaven. It warms my heart and helps lessen the pain of not having him here. Last year my mom gave my sisters and I ornaments that say: I love you all dearly, Now don't shed a tear, I'm spending my Christmas With Jesus this year. As we decorated the tree the other day, I hung that ornament nearby this one that I bought in honor of Noah . While I cried my way through a show the other night on who we'd like the chance to spend one more day with and what we would do if we only had one hour to live , I felt a peace come over me that while I won't get another day with my dad in this lifeti...